my favorite things

If Oprah can have a show dedicated to her favorite things, then I'm gonna have a post detailing all of MY favorite things. The difference would be that Oprah's favorites are GAY and mine are NOT GAY.

favorite tv show: MacGyver

favorite paper: college-ruled notebook

favorite mountain (non-volcanic): Aconcagua

favorite volcano: Kilimanjaro

favorite SCH- word: schwas

favorite president: Coolidge

favorite description for soup: creamy goodness

favorite thing to make stuff out of: material

favorite way to do things: like a mo fo

favorite televangelist: Ernest Angley

favorite guy with huge ears: Ernest Angley

favorite name for an unidentified corpse: John Doe

favorite tractor: John Deere

favorite letter: Dear John

favorite junk email: Enlarge your penis

favorite non-junk email: Enlarge your penis

favorite Michael Jackson: the one who used to play wide receiver for the Browns

favorite Happy Days character: Ralph Malph

favorite bodily ache: sore toe

favorite captain: Planet

favorite planet: of the Apes